Well....

Hm...
I guess there is only a few more hours of freedome until school starts..
I feel Lost these days.. I dont know why..
I cant play my music right.. I cant even do the simple notes in my Violin and Guitar!
HOW CAN THAT BE!
I stopped a few hours after i tried... I felt.. So weak.. So.. So.. Helpless.. Pathetic..
I dont know what to do..
My mind was Racing.. My heart beats are more and more helpless...
I locked myself in my room.. I coudnt face my family.. I was.. Scared..i was loosing myself at that moment..
Right now i feel helpless..
Or maybe thats because im sick.. I did have a cold a few days ago.. and im still sick right now..
I guess... Thats maybe why i Didnt feel well.. Or maybe i didnt pray and thank God for everything that i have right now..
Im soo helpless..
I dont know what to do...
And school is another thing that makes me MORE AND MORE Frustrated..
What am i going to do?
I wonder if i can hm.. Meditate. But i dont even know how..
I mean deep breaths.. Thats all i can DO!
Uhhh... I guess ill do something in the morning.. .. :(